I used to admire the people who could run and run and run and never stop, and could tackle anything head on, and then when they were done, still do more.
I tried to be those people. I’d run and work and work late and come early and skip days off and hustle… I’d run and run and run, until I ran myself into the ground.
And then I’d get sick and the days that weren’t meant for rest were now taken up by recovering.
But God, when he created the world, didn’t work for six days and then on the seventh recover. No, he rested.
So who am I, to work and work to the point of recovery, rather than rest? Who am I to think I can run harder and further than The Creator?
I used to admire the hustle.
But now I admire those who rest. The sabbath keepers. The ones who let the balls drop and the plates crash to the floor, because they’re just done with the juggling and the keeping up and the striving and the wanting more. The ones who work hard but give more time and value and worth to their relationships and their self than to the work.
And so I’m giving up the hustle.
I think this is part of my learning to live present. Doing my creative best with what God has given me, sinking myself into it, completely and fully, and then being content with what has been accomplished at the end of the day.
As Walter Brueggeman writes in Sabbath as Resistance, "Those who remember and keep Sabbath find they are less driven, less coerced, less frantic to meet deadlines, free to be, rather than free to do."
I want to be free to be. present, awake, alive. I don't want to be driven by my deadlines or by my work or by a hustle to meet everyone's needs. I want to live like Shauna Niequist says: More love, less hustle.
I will work hard, and then I will rest.
I'm giving up the hustle.